When does the expression of anger become an ‘anger management’ problem?
Critical indicators would be frequency, force and volume.
If anger “erupts,” then we are not in control of it.
If the angry person yells and screams, becomes verbally or physically abusive, or breaks things, then anger management is needed.
If one deals with stress by venting anger at others, this is misdirected anger and is inappropriate.
Anger negatively affects the physiology of the one who expresses it, and of those who witness it: it compromises the immune system.
We cannot blame the behavior of others for our own angry reactions.
We all feel anger from time to time, but we are responsible for our own behaviors and must learn to choose fair and healthy ways of dealing with it.
Anger management is not just for those who express it forcefully.
One who gets angry at every little thing, though keeping fairly quiet about it — perhaps even withdrawing from others — would also benefit from anger management.
Quiet, repressed anger can create as much damage to the self and relationships as the other kind.
Gwen Randall-Young is an author and award-winning Psychotherapist.
